Starting the post
The last two weeks have been a bit quieter and sort of lackadaisical, but now we are back to working. Loren has duplicated some 10 hours of tapes and I need to start translating it all this weekend. My good friend Adnan will be helping me translate it all, for which I am forever grateful. It is a pretty hard job, specially when there is so much material (we have some 130 hours altogether, between the two cameras!). So, Adnan is my hero right now! :)

We are also meeting with Marcia, our web designer, who will help us set up a "real" web-site, where you'll be able to read up on all of us, see what we look like and stay updated on the whole movie extravaganza. 'Cause I know you want to know more about it and this way of sharing all the info can be stiffling. I mean, you have to read through all these words without anything to distract you! ;)

Oh, yes, one more bit of news. Visa Ideas-Happen people are sending me to LA for a 3-day weekend in August. It is for some business workshop that Visa organized for all us winners. Sounds pretty cool on top of being put up in a fancy hotel and having 3 days in LA. I've never been there. I am so looking forward to being a tourist, for a change. You know - with my sneakers on and camera in hand. We hate them when they crowd our NY streets, but inevitably turn into them when we go somewhere new. If anyone has any suggestions as to what I should see and not bother with, feel free to share.

I think that's it for today.

Stay cool,

Sabina
- posted by Sabina @ 4:25 PM -

 
We Won!!!
Hi - it is Alison here.

After months of e-mails and url's and check ins and rewrites and especially huge huge support from our friends and family, we are proud to announce that Back to Bosnia has been chosen as a winner of a $25,000 grant from Visa's Ideas Happen contest.

This is wonderful, wonderful news! You can see the other winning categories and read our proposal at www.ideashappen.com.

I want to stress that this does not undermine your donations. We did not learn about this contest until today, and as you all know we have just returned from what we hope was the most expensive part of our journey. Everything that we paid for: food, plane tickets, film was purchased with your donations and our credit cards (please don't tell my mother). We were riding on faith and hard work and we thank each and every one of you who supported us either with your good thoughts or donations. It all feels good to us and we are just glad now that we can relax a little and really make this the best movie possible.

Loren has started duping all of the tapes, and I hope to be in the editing room by next week.

The New York Times has shown an interest for the programming they have along with the Discovery channel, and I think we are interested in PBS and the film festival circuit as well. So, keep your eye out for us, and as you know, we'll tell you everything that is going on right here!

Thanks again and congratulations!!!!
- posted by Sabina @ 5:28 PM -

 
Back to Bosnia, My heart is still there...
Hello it is Alison, one of the producers, here.

This has been such a fulfilling and interesting trip that I cannot even remember everything that I have done for the past two weeks much less think I will be able to fully process it for quite some time. The United States seems like quite a culture shock now, after having been immersed in the Bosnian land and some of its experience, but I will try to convey some of what I remember, and more of an overview of the trip, since Sabina was able to give you some particulars in the below blog.

As she noted, as an American I could only understand the culture through what she or her family could explain and what I would absorb emotionally from the people, circumstances and observations I made. The language rolled right by me, but the intentions and emotions were all the same.

The first thing that comes to mind when I think about the countryside is the beautiful landscape, lush rolling hills, summery winding rivers and plenty of people playing and farming out doors under the dappled sky. The next thing, however is how people are living in this country. It seemed to me that the houses were all either brand new, run down from neglect of occupiers, in a state of construction, or had been completely decimated by bombs or shelling. This is very much a reality that covers the whole country in varying degrees from where there was more fighting or less. The sad part is, where there was less visual evidence of fighting, there was more oppression.

In each of these homes there is a different story, which is very significant to our trip and probably why Sabina feels as though we just scratched the surface of these people. There is so much to tell and so many people who are ready to share their story because no one gave them a change, and no country would listen while they were being harmed.

It is highlighted and made real by watching my best friend look through the apartment in which she grew up, but cannot touch because some other teenage girl lay claim to it. I do not understand the conscience behind it. I do not know how this family living in Sabina's apartment can have so much disreguard for the things that are truly not theirs. There are items that were handmade by Sabina's mother's sister, which now hold their tv remote control without a thought of anything being amiss. It is a sensibility that is criminal.

In the town on Banja Luka people do not greet eachother on the street because they don't know if you have come back to take their stolen property away from them, or if you are looking at one of the persons living in your bedroom. There is no way to trust eachother until you can say hello and find out whose side you are on.

The opression is obvious until you find someone who is on your side. Then the warmth and openness abounds, and a generosity of spirit I have never known in the States pours through people's hearts.

I don't think I fully understood the reality of the situation until we arrived in Sanski Most to look at the identification hall where exhumed bodies are being identified as they are found and dug up from across the countryside. As Sabina describes, there are boots and bones, clothes and skulls, remnants of people's lives that are fresh. Not a movie, not something exciting because it is so different to what I experience in my life in the US, but something very real and happeneing right now, probably in more places than just this one. It upsets me that no one can do anything about it, or that the time is past, or that this is now just a part of their lives. That these men working to clean off these clothes of the dead are lucky to have these jobs becuase the state of thier country and government is not for them.

In some ways there does seem to be some change in the country. Villages are being rebuilt, criminals are being forced out, murderers are being arrested.

Sabina's mother says, " What do things matter to me? That is nothing. I have my family, I have everything I need right here."

As true as it is, there is also a truth to the scars she bears and the life she will now have to live without her family as a result of someone else's desire. My lesson is that her heart is still in the right place despite all of this action and opression and I hope to always learn from this.

Alison
- posted by Sabina @ 1:32 PM -

 
Back in USA
Please accept my sincere apologies for not updating this site for the last 10 days or so. We tried and failed both in Banja Luka and Sarajevo, to locate and use a working internet cafe. I even wrote one post and lost it, due to the system overload (they use internet cafes for gaming purposes, so no fast uploads).

But, in any case, we did it and are back in NY. It was a trip full of stress and noticeable lack of sleep, but all in all, it was an amazing experience for all of us. I am sure you are all curious as to what happened, so let's start where we left off.

Banja Luka. We arrived there on Thursday, July 3rd and stayed until Tuesday, July 8th. Still, it was too rushed and we felt that we just started to scratch the surface by the time we had to leave.

Drive from Zagreb to Banja Luka was full of emotions and tears. Both of my parents were nervous and full of expectations, fear, frustration and hopes. Driving in my father commented how it is different and, yet, how it reminds him so much of the last time he was on that road, leaving Banja Luka. My mom only cried.

We reached our destination by evening and were welcomed by some old friends and my father's youngest brother Lili. Lili was the same, full of kisses and jokes. We stayed up way too late and tried to catch up on the last 12 years of our lives. I think my American crew was bored out of their minds, but I enjoyed the comfort only a family can provide.

Next morning was time for action. First stop graveyard where my father worked as a grave digger for 3 months in 1995 (as his work assignment by the Serbian forces). Once there, we came across an exhumation conducted by Jasmin Odobasic, deputy head of the Commission for Missing Persons, and his team. After we introduced ourselves and reassured everyone that we are not a threat to them and their work (regardless of our camera and sound equipment) they let us stay and even shared their stories and photos with us. That morning they were exhuming two bodies. One of them was of a man whose whole family was there, who was brought to Banja Luka hospital in the beginning of the war and then killed. The other one was one of 8 bodies which were found in river Vrbas in 1992 and is believed to be a victim of a concentration camp Manjaca. Both of them were taken to an identification hall in nearby Sanski Most.

Jasmin offered that we come the next day and see the 600 bodies there, waiting to be identified, and, of course, we took him up on it. Next day we were off to Sanski Most, making a drive-by shooting of Omarska, Keraterm and Trnopolje (3 concentration camps in Prijedor). The site we found was chilling and extremely sad. Three guys washing the clothes they took off the dead bodies so that they can be used to identify their owners. A hall full of bones and some body bags, walls covered in lists of those still missing. It was hard to remember, watching all that, that those bones belonged to someone, to a live person once. A person who had his dreams and hopes and who died a horrid death from the hand of his friend, his neighbor, his cousin. As we watched it all, I noticed a group of kids playing on a nearby hill, oblivious to the hall, to the work conducted there, to death that surrounded the place. I wondered if any of them lost anyone in this war and smiled at the possibility that they found a way to forget. Because remembering it all can only kill you, slowly and painfully.

Back in Banja Luka, we decided to face those enemies closer to me and my parents. So, we went to the apartment which belonged to us and from which my father was thrown out, in order for a Serb family to move in. The entire family was still there. When they saw the cameras, they started to get angry and fearful. One of the daughters did not want to talk to us at all, but her sister was more than happy to fill in for her. I even got in a bit of a fight with her. I tried my best to go in and out without any conflict, but she provoked and I lost my temper. Just thinking of it makes me mad, even now. I wanted to feel some compassion for them and to understand their problems, but when faced with it full force I realized that it was a naive wish. It was as if I was a knight wanting to understand the dragon I was about to fight. There is no understanding when fire starts coming your way. All you can do is pull out that sword and hope you survive.

And survived we did. The whole event left deep scars on my heart, but that will heal. I am comforted by the thought that they were left in greater fear than they ever felt before.

After that we went to my grandparent's country house, which is also now occupied by another Serb family. They were a bit more welcoming, but the fear and fakeness of their hospitality soon started to shine through the facade. The son of the family couldn't even look me in the eye. I wondered if he was scared or furious at the thought that he will have to leave this house, this life he stole from me. I hoped for both.

There are many other little details that escape me now, due to jet-lag and lack of sleep, but all in all Banja Luka was just as I expected it to be and more. Sad, depressing and overwhelmingly unfamiliar.

After that we spent a day in Sarajevo and then headed south to Vodice, where we saw the rest of my father's side of the family. That was fantastic and a really really great way to end the whole adventure. I caught up with some of them and relaxed a bit. Just in time for a return back home.

Now we have to view all the footage we have and start to edit. It should be fun. I'll keep you informed...

Sabina

PS I asked both Ali and Loren to post their own summaries of the trip and hopefully they will. It is surely very different for a foreigner to go through it all...

- posted by Sabina @ 11:57 AM -

 
Back to Bosnia - Update
Good afternoon! It is our third or fourth day here in Zagreb, we are full on in to our filming at this point, though we have had a few adventures along the way.The first thing that happened was we had to fire our Director of Photography (DP). We had hired someone through a connection of Sabina's cousin. He came highly reccommended, and despite a few instincts that made us think otherwise, he turned out to be a wedding videographer with the attitude of Francis Coppola. Actually, Francis is probably a much nicer man than this DP, so we had to go through breaking our contract with him (it was for no money, so it wasn't too hard) and dealing with his monsterous ego. Everything worked out in the end, especially when he told us, he probably couldn't have done it anyway (two days into shooting).

Alma, Sabina's cousin and her husband, Nikola, helped us immeasureably as we called what seemed like hundreds of people to try and secure another. We didn't have anyone for a day and Loren our venerable producer had to jump in for our first serious shoot day when Emir and Aida arrived at the airport. While she was off shooting with Mutt our sound guy at her side, I was meeting with two new prospects and interviewing them for the position. We did not go with these men, but they proved an immeasureable help with equipment and just wonderful supporters, besides.

Now we have Damier, aka Okkie, who is the fiance of Emir's cousin. He is almost family and therefore gave us a very good rate, as well as jumped on an airplane immediately with nothing more than a backpack to his name. He dove right in the way we wanted and though I am sure he is overwhelmed, we are immeasureably relieved.

Today we are off to Banja Luka. We are a little nervous, each in our own way. Emir is going home. Aida will try to get her apartment back and Sabina will have to translate for all of us. We tried to get permission from the UN to shoot various former concentration camps, but I have had only a limited amount of luck with this. I have found information depends upon the individual. Nothing is secure, nothing for sure. It is a lawless land and your friends are your only allies, and only then, those who were made after the war.

From my end there is much speculation as to what may happen and what I may see. As an American with a very limited exposure to anything representing war, I feel very naive going in to this land. I also think that may be the one thing allowing me to go. Perhaps I am exagerating, though I have heard enough to think it may not be over thought.

I could go on for pages, though the van is waiting and we are behind schedule. All of the people I have met are more than wonderful. They help family in a way I have never experienced. Everyone is very open with money, beds, food and drink. I am having a wonderful time and I think I might even be learning a little of the language.

Dovigena.

Alison






- posted by Sabina @ 2:35 AM -